Just a quick question... I'm trying to fast for four days, how long is the longest you've gone with fasting and how much weight did you lose? <3

i swear every effort i make to try and slim down my thighs fails miserably. thigh presses etc. havent made any difference :(

Argh I don't know what to do! I binged and now I am FIVE lb heavier! And I can't exercise because I am injured and I can't run through it anymore because it hurts too much. When I can run I can lose 5lb of binge weight in one day but now I can't get rid of it! Fasting is not enough. I got laxatives and diet pills for the first time in AGES today. Better than nothing but not enough. What else can I do? I feel like there must be something! I'm going to make myself cry when I get home so I can at least lose a tiny bit of weight in tears. I'm nuts. I just really need to get my weight down NOW! I know it will go down eventually but I just CAN'T STAND IT!

I'm so disappointed with myself. I really felt like I had my eating under control this time. I was being more moderate with my restricting and exercising because I am sort of trying to recover/not be as bad. I know why I binged. I have been too scared to go out for quite a while. I wanted to push myself to do it. Its part of what I'm supposed to do for therapy. I finally managed to get out and see a good friend. When I got home I had a panic attack and binged. It's so depressing that I can't even see a good friend. I feel like I'm never going to get better.

is it weird that i can either eat nothing but small, restricted meals that i have planned ahead? like if i take so much as one bite of something else, i bag it all and binge? i hate how im either all or nothing.

 I am so depressed with no motivation to get up off my but at all..i havn't left the house in two days so no one will look at me because i feel like am and ugly cow:(

Last night I took half an e pill with my best friend.
It wasn't my first time, but I feel like shit.
I have not slept, and I really want to but I'm not sure how.
I feel like shit,  and guilty about it. I just.. ugh I don't know anymore.
I just can't help it. I wanted to try it again, see what it felt like again.
I wish there was some way I could say NO.
But I'm so fucking spineless right now. I only like doing mary jane. I don't like other drugs.
It's a good high for a bit then im just fucking down for the rest of the week.

On top of that I have plans today. I have to go see my friend, we have plans to smoke weed, and see a movie.
I can't cancel on her because it's been forever and I miss her.

If anyone knows anyways to help sleep, or to make you feel better coming off e, please let me know.

<3xx 

Toooonight i am wearing-

Size 8 (UK) French Connection denim dungarees- £20 (in sale raa!)
Size 8 (UK) black leggings from Top Shop- £10
(Fake....eh) Dolce and Gabbana sunglasses- £8
SEXY kneee length black leather heels from Clarks- £75

Accessories- purple mock crocodile skin bag from Clarks- £25
Silver and garnet (red for my ANAS) ring, which i got in a vintage store- £8

Is my full outfit less than £150? YES

Do i FEEl like A BILLION DOLLARS in it????

Hell Yeah!!!

I look like a frickin model i sware. Give me a nip and tuck here and there and i could model for dior, hahaha.

Nah im kidding, i aint that vain. Still, feel very pretty today xxx

I made a collage type thing of all the things I like. It consumed alot of my time....
http://i33.tinypic.com/259fnd3.jpg